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WaW Before I Do: 3 Things I Hope You Are Doing In Your Marriage

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Monique & I both love traveling. We love traveling with our families (even if packing, waking them up is a pain) but also at least once or twice a year, we also make it a point to travel by ourselves. I know for many hands on responsible parents, this is a huge NO-NO! Kids should always come… right? But what if your marriage is damaged, won’t that affect your kids too? Saying No to “time alone” says this — if we focus on being good parents being a good spouse will follow. May I correct you? It’s actually the other way around. When you become a good husband or wife and your kids see it, you are actually modeling a good example for them to follow. So I’ve come up a list of three things that I believe every family should be doing so that your marriage will be strengthened and so will your parenting. 1. Pray together out loud – this may get intimidating at first and sometimes in our family, my kids Ezra and JD would actually even point fingers at each other on who would go first. First of all, I show them that it’s never a …

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WaW Before I Do: Becoming Closer

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We’ve organized the “Before & After I do” www.beforeidoworkshop.com 21x the past decade. Recently, I’ve been thinking, for couples who attend who are not fully surrendered to Jesus and for whatever reason do not read the Bible (either busy or they don’t believe in it) and perhaps some may even be there happy to pick-up a nugget of gold or two (selective in what they are to accept), what probably is the topic that they most find not clear or hard to swallow. Aside from the wife submitting to the husband, I guess it would be this diagram. What this says is, that if you want to be closer to each other, the only way to do this is to get close to God. Do you get the point? A non-debating Christian would probably agree, a normal Christian would probably ask some questions and a cynical person would ask the following questions: If you look at it at a normal person’s stand point, the questions do make sense and so in this article, I would like to give clarity to it and stress out why I believe this principle is correct. The main point in layman’s term is this: “You …

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WaW Before I Do: 10 Financial Tips Before Getting Married

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1. The Great Huddle Find a time to sit down and discuss all financial matters between you and your fiancé. In this huddle session, you are to be transparent regarding your financial status. It’s like presenting your Statement of Assets, Liabilities and Net Worth (SALN) to each other. Here you can have a clear picture of how much each one earns, spends, invest and in some cases what kind of debt you will be marrying into. This meeting is a MUST because it gives you a framework of the life and lifestyle you will be having as a married couple. 2. Seek a Financial Counselor to see how to merge your finances We are strong believers in seeking help to build a strong foundation of marriage. You may want to attend financial learning seminars like the Family and Finance Seminar. You can opt to sit with a financial adviser to help give you direction and can help build a 5- year plan for your family finances. 3. Set up your first budget as a couple. You can start putting down both your monthly income in an excel file column (make sure its net of all taxes and benefits such as …

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WaW Before I Do: The Marriage Club

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Do you know that it is only in the Philippines where we have godparents as part of our wedding entourage?  In several cross cultural weddings, foreigners would find it very unique for Filipinos to have “Principal Sponsors”.  We believe “godparents” are handpicked to help couples be guided through married life. We have seen godparents of the bride and groom from their baptism or dedication become the same godparents in the next phase of their life. There are those that have impacted the couple the most in their career or relationship that they find it significant for them to be part of their sponsors list. In many Filipino weddings they invite very respectable and honorable VIPs to be part of the married couple’s life. The concept of having godparents is an ideal picture for any married couple starting up their family. Interestingly though, 90% of the time godparents never really play an active role in the marriage of the couple. That is why treading into married life can be very lonely at times.  I say lonely because you have no one to confide to when issues creep in. No one is cheering you on or is giving you a check and …

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WaW Before I Do: Temperaments

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Monique and I are really quite different. I am a born leader and visionary. I want to make things happen and will do everything to reach it. I am very result oriented. I get the greatest high seeing things accomplished. Then I met Monique. She is very creative. She loves talking and is the life of the party. She is Ms. Congeniality. But there are things that gets to me. She has the tendency to be late. She is a great starter and she inspires people but she thrives in short projects and can’t seem to be doing something on a routine. I realize while we were dating that we are really two different people. This is my proof that I do love her because despite the flaws I have learned to love the whole package and appreciate how God made her. But as we know many couples will find themselves in a major hurdle because they can’t seem to pass the fact that their spouse can irritate them. Are these one of the things that are issues to you? If one of these things bother you, we have good news for you. It’s really no biggie. Every person has …